How can we let more love in? How can we avoid turning into that crotchety old geezer with the slumped over shoulders and closed heart?

We have the power to keep our hearts open throughout this life but it does demand an act of courage!

What if I told you that the way to avoid becoming guarded and closed was in allowing and surrendering (to pain) …. are you still with me?

Take a moment to recall what you might consider a “painful” memory. Try not to go into the story of this dark memory rather silently ask yourself, “What did I learn from that experience?” Really take a moment to relish in the wisdom you discovered from the past.

So often when we experience pain we permanently store it. If we could see the metaphorical download in the brain its title might read: NEVER AGAIN!! RUN FOR YOUR LIFE NOW!


Interestingly enough when even a hint of a potentially painful situation appears upon our path, we unconsciously launch into a mode of avoidance or fear. We unknowingly close our hearts. One common example of this is when people choose to have a dog. They enjoy this relationship for at least 10 years. But once the dog passes the people emphatically say, “We will never have another dog. We don’t want to feel that type of pain or loss ever again!” I say, “Really? You are choosing to close your heart in that moment. You are choosing to shut yourself off from the love of another dog. Yes the grief can be unbearable but honestly in this scenario it heals more quickly with the decision to open your heart and home to a new fur friend.

When we attempt to avoid a potential future pain we literally impede our own opportunity to experience more love an expansion!

It’s as if we understand and know that our painful experiences have offered us our grandest lessons – but we still choose to flee. These painful lessons teach us about life, love, forgiveness, softening and compassion.

So what in the world can we do?

We can let love in
We can learn to recognize this pattern
Silently remind ourselves that we know nothing of the future (for certain)
And lastly trust that

“Love never fails” 1 Corinthians 13


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